Cocaine addiction: former UN officer reveals secret double life

A former United Nations officer has come forward with a raw, first-person account of how a promising career in international development unraveled amid a severe cocaine addiction. His story moves from cocktail parties with ministers to buying drugs from teens in the streets of South America, and it raises uncomfortable questions about the human cost of the region’s drug economy.

He says the habit escalated to daily binges that left him physically damaged and professionally disqualified, and now, after cycles of rehab, he is publicly urging a rethink of drug policy — arguing that legalization could undercut armed groups who profit from cocaine trafficking.

A climb into addiction while working for the UN

After finishing university and a stint at a policy think tank, the man took a research post with the UN Development Programme in Rio de Janeiro. He says what began as occasional use in Europe soon became a heavy dependency once he was posted across Latin America.

• Initial exposure: He first tried cocaine in 2016, purchasing it via the dark web while a student in Europe.
• Professional life: His UN role involved projects aimed at poverty reduction and sustainable development, putting him in contact with government officials and community leaders.
• Escalation: By the time he was posted to Ecuador in 2020, the addiction had intensified; cheap, high-purity supply and rising gang power made access easy.

He describes rapid deterioration in his health and behavior, including a septum injury he says left a coin-sized hole — a physical mark of how deep the habit had become. At its worst, he estimates his consumption reached up to five grams of cocaine a day.

Close calls: violence, armed teens, and working while high

The former officer recounts scenes that could belong in a crime drama: meeting armed teenage dealers, seeing brutal extrajudicial violence, and even taking drugs in locations tied to security forces.

Specific incidents he reported

• Being detained at gunpoint in Quito after a long binge, witnessing police beatings of others detained with him, then showing up hours later for work.
• Using cocaine inside a compound that had once housed former FARC fighters and later, he says, inside a Colombian Army base.
• Snorting drugs in a police headquarters bathroom before attending a meeting on drug trafficking.
• Watching what he describes as a “Sicario-like execution” while assigned to rural Colombia.

Despite those episodes, he continued to move within elite circles — participating in meetings with ministers and local officials, and even attending a conversation with Ecuador’s environment ministry while still under the influence. He has described this period as a secret double life, hiding addiction behind the façade of a UN career.

How work responsibilities and addiction collided

At first, the international organization’s remote-work flexibility during the pandemic and the ubiquity of masks helped conceal his impairment. But the situation caught up with him after a severe cocaine-induced psychotic episode. Medical and security evaluations ultimately led to the denial of the clearance he needed to continue UN duties.

The termination of his contract forced him into repeated treatment attempts. He reports spending years in and out of rehab programs; at the time of speaking, he said he had achieved around four months clean.

Why he now publicly advocates for legalization

Having bought cocaine for years across Ecuador, Colombia, and Brazil, he argues that criminalization has empowered violent networks rather than diminished drug consumption. His position is blunt: current policies fuel armed groups, and moving the product into a regulated market could strip those groups of their most lucrative revenue stream.

“Decades of supply-side interventions have not produced the outcomes we were promised,” he told reporters. “What we see now are teenagers with guns controlling distribution and fighting over market share.”

He believes legalization would likely shift profits away from criminal organizations and reduce the extreme levels of gang-related violence that have torn through communities and prisons in parts of Latin America. While acknowledging that regulation would not solve every problem, he frames it as a pragmatic step toward reducing bloodshed tied to the cocaine trade.

What the personal toll looked like

Beyond the public-policy argument, his testimony lays bare how addiction can erode a person’s life and career. He says his behavior became erratic, elevating risk not only to himself but also to the people and projects he represented as a UN staffer. He recalls buying drugs from armed teenagers and still being haunted by those moments.

He also described feeling profound shame over decisions that mixed professional responsibilities with episodes of heavy drug use: attending high-level meetings while impaired, and operating in conflict zones while beholden to dealers for supply.

Practical details and where he used drugs

He listed several specific environments where he used cocaine, underscoring the reach of his addiction across different settings:

1. Urban centers such as Rio de Janeiro and Quito.
2. Rural areas in Colombia, including former FARC zones.
3. Security-related sites: a military base and police facilities.

These details highlight how the boundaries between official workspaces and the illicit market blurred for him, creating a risk-laden mix of access and exposure.

Support resources and next steps for readers

If you or someone you know is struggling with substance use, help is available. The U.S. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) operates a National Helpline that provides free, confidential treatment referral and information:

• Call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) for immediate assistance.
• Visit the SAMHSA website for a searchable treatment locator and guidance on local services.

The former UN officer’s account was recorded for a longer feature published by VICE’s members-only section, where he details the episodes and his policy views at greater length. He has also shared periodic updates on social platforms as he continues recovery and advocacy work.

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William Anderson

William Anderson is a multimedia producer specializing in videos, podcasts, and interactive galleries. With five years of immersive content creation, he turns information into a rich audio‑visual experience. His storytelling skills draw you directly into the heart of every story, on any platform.